The tired despair I feel on rolling back the latest code
\nShould really not compare to heartsick feelings for the wronged,
\nThe pained, the lost, the dying, lonely unwashed left alone.
\nAnd yet….
\n The hordes of homeless, each intersection’s beggars,
\nThe staring children of hopeless hunger and mothers with matted hair,
\nCompel me only to turn away, distract from distrait worries
\nAnd fulminate against the state of things today,
\nWhile the abandoned code, the project furled, product of months
\nOf labor, months of work \u2013 and fear for the inescapable post mortem,
\nThese and these alone strike the strings of despair and angst,
\nPull me into funk and woe.
\n No, no, that’s untrue.
\nThe feeling wrapped around my spineless heart is more belike
\nA shallow, petty, sighing stound of hopeless black fatigue.
\nUnused test cases lie in readiness for needless tests
\nOf phases next; evaluations lacking portent sit
\nWithin the drive unread. A sad and lingering pall, a dearth
\nOf meaning strikes its atonal chord against my mind,
\nImpaired by scores of doubts and Monday-morning quarterbacks.
\nBut for the truly hapless, haunted by a thousand plagues
\nOf man’s devising, scalded by the boiling furies, damned
\nBy broken gods bereft of power save ability
\nTo more entirely make still lower the lowest of the low,
\nWhy, then, no pang of anger, love, regret, or fear?
\nHow have the humans ceased inhabiting soul and memory,
\nReplaced by ill-defined concern for projects not to be?
\nPerhaps the hungry only can provoke anxiety,
\nTheir millions meaningless before salvation’s hopelessness.
\nWhile futile plans betrayed by harsh light may yet
\nInspire redoubts of hope that make to dream what might have been.
\nSo projects failed may be inspected, viewed, dissected, while
\nThe plights of many \u2013 nay! a single human only can
\nProvoke a fatal, fearful contemplation leading straight
\nTo resignation final ‘gainst the horrid failure seen
\nWithin my all-too-awful worthless human soul and heart.<\/p>\n
[coda<\/span>] The tired despair I feel on rolling back the latest code Should really not compare to heartsick feelings for the wronged, The pained, the lost, the dying, lonely unwashed left alone. And yet…. The hordes of homeless, each intersection’s beggars, The staring children of hopeless hunger and mothers with matted hair, Compel me only to … <\/p>\n
\nBut with this gentle screaming comes a hope revealing near
\nTo human pathos and an empathetic wish for more
\nThan this too fragile longing towards a reconnection sure
\nOf sinew, synapse, temper, merit, worthy spirit most
\nOf all. Perhaps a mad redeeming may arise from such
\nA dreaming: each to each, one heart availing hope to souls
\nNow helpless, seeming lost but then rekindled by one
\nMost tiny ember, thoughts of deadlines, costs and benefits
\nThen ended and replaced by hungry yearning for true hearts’
\nReturning, facing one another eye to eye to view
\nWith weakness open, strength refocused and unbroken breath,
\nResolved to take always the things that are just as they are.
\nSo may unworthy worry and repugnance be at ease,
\nAnd not subside as other mazy lost velleities.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"