My Confession

Thinking of the Ligurian Sea
Where the romantics go to drown,
Somber as the Tuscan sun sets
Speaking the ineffable noun
My heart a hopeless wanderer
Fleeing pregnant ghosts
Seeking in parti-colored silks
To evade accusing hosts.
The fear a promise unrealized,
The events trivial and benign,
Oppressed beneath the clearest skies,
The punishment condign.

As if words could salve the wound
Of silence purpos’d or rash.
Instead, I light a pyre of dream and desire,
Burn my cigarette heart to ash.
The foetus in the suicide’s womb
As the heartsick cold closes in –
Regrets at graveside or crepuscular shore,
The distance remains infinite.
So I’m thinking (though thoughts cannot help)
Of life beneath a darkening sky,
Of remains on a beach where once I wept,
Where poets go to die.

Sonnet

(for Anne, on our 16th wedding anniversary)

The words, you say, are easy; numbers – no.
And yet your constant true addition makes
Multiply our joys. Your love me takes
To planes and spheres where never words can go.
Though some reckon to grow their purse
By calculating reasoned rates of return,
If never I from you divide, I’ll learn
The mathematics of the universe.
Five thousand, eight hundred and forty-four days.
Do two become one? Or one made from twain?
Two to the two to the two the powered refrain
Make half a billion seconds of love that stays.
Neither words nor figures may equate
The blessed bliss of this, my married state.

Poetry?

You call this poetry? she said,
Why, a child, I say, a child —

Perhaps it sounds better than it looks.
Read it. Read it! Aloud and in a voice
Speaking of gold and purple banners,
Of the soaring falcon above his prey.
Dont just use your usual voice,
And dont slump your shoulders.

No, that’s no good, she said,
No good at all. The metres all wrong
And is it supposed to rhyme?
Nobody writes rhyming poetry anymore.
And what are you trying to say?

Two Sandwiches

The sandwiches made with love
To comfort on this long, strained flight
I’ll never eat.
The mad rush to get the bags,
To stand in line sullen and weary
In shoeless feet, pockets empty,
And I forget, standing staring nowhere,
At the motionless bags before me,
The other shuffling lines of security’s counterfeit.
I forget, until the wallet rejoins its license,
And slides into its pocket,
And the shoes, plucked from their gray barge
Through the x-ray underworld, regain my feet.
With unwonted forlorn sunken sighing,
I remember
The brown paper sack with two sandwiches,
A bag of chips and trail mix,
And extra trail mix, in case my father
Wants extra nuts
Sitting on the floor of the van
Forgotten
In the mad rush to grab the bags.

As the safety video blares unwatched
Bracketed by the homily of the airline’s CEO
And an even louder ad for a car,
My knees against the middle seat before me
I miss those sandwiches
And miss you more
Homesick before we even leave the gate.

Friday Vocabulary

1. Comstockery — “censorship because of perceived obscenity or immorality” (George Bernard Shaw)

Though named after an anti-smut crusader of the 1870s, Comstockery has a long reach through American culture, as the example of Tipper Gore can attest.

 

2. poetaster — writer of inferior, insignificant verse

The popular anthologies circulating in the United States in the late 19th Century are filled with the tawdry outpourings of maudlin poetasters.

 

3. titrate — to determine quantity of a substance in a solution by adding reagent of known quantity until measurable reaction completes

No matter how much his friends attempted to titrate Bob’s soul by teasing him viciously, his patience seemed immeasurable.

 

4. pruriginous — causing or pertaining to prurigo; hence, by extension, causing itchiness

The scholar’s pruriginous didacticism made him persona non grata at the faculty parties.

 

5. katagelasticism — joy at laughing at others without compunction

No, your humor goes far beyond mere schadenfreude; it verges on a psychopathic and vicious katagelasticism.

 

6. hortatory — tending to encourage; exhorting

His hortatory remarks out of the way, the speaker admitted that any contributions were not tax-deductable.

 

7. ithyphallic — of the phallus carried in ancient Bacchus festivals; hence, of or pertaining to an erect penis

Though an ithyphallic display was once a striking homage to fertility and life, now it is more likely to be a sign that you should consult a physician immediately.

 

8. synechia — eye disease wherein the iris adheres to either the cornea or the lens

His refusal to treat the synechia he suffered as a result of the beating led to glaucoma.

 

9. zetetic — proceding by investigation (often used in contradistinction to pejorative view of the term “skeptic”)

The debunking battles of the late 20th Century led to a reactionary debunking of the debunkers, as in the case of the zetetic view that UFOs deserved more open-minded investigation than they were receiving.

 

10. quean — a disreputable woman, especially a prostitute (Archaic)

The many references to queans in Stuart literature may confuse the modern reader, who may presume another sex is meant.

Friday Vocabulary

1. a fortiori — all the more, for an even stronger reason

Since she hired a private detective to shadow her husband, then a fortiori she would have no compunction in reading his personal email.

 

2. dido — bauble, trifle

She wore a necklace she had made from a little dido she had found among costume jewelry at the church rummage sale.

 

3. tinnitus — a ringing in the ears

His enjoyment of piano concertos was sullied by his constant tinnitus, an unfortunate consequence of a mispent youth and too many Scorpions concerts.

 

4. interstice — a small space between things

Our son found almost twelve dollars worth of change in the interstices of the couch.

 

5. panchreston — an explanation which attempts to cover all possibilities in a situation, but which is too generalized to be of practical use

Joel always managed to strike out with women by following explicitly the panchrestron of his older brother’s dating advice.

 

6. fervid — passionate or zealous

Despite my fervid attempts to make her see reason, the meter maid gave me a parking ticket anyway.

 

7. clinamen — the unpredictable swerve of atoms, in the philosophy of Lucretius

Free will was posited to derive from the clinamen by Lucretius, and this unexpected and unpredictable behavior has become the cornerstone of many other critical theories ranging from literature to psychology.

 

8. puce — dark or brownish purple

He still bore the signs of the beating, though his puce bruises had faded to a sickly green.

 

9. antiphrasis — use of a word in the opposite sense of its usual meaning

“How wonderful to see you,” Marcia greeted her ex-husband’s girlfriend, the ironic antiphrasis unnoticed as usual by the blonde high school dropout.

 

10. defray — pay costs or expenses

Herbert looked upon his theft of test answers as simply a means to defray his tuition.

Friday Vocabulary

1. prosopopeia — personification (Rhetoric)

The walls spoke silently of years of decaying neglect, the persistent prosopopeia of drywall and dust sounding its forlorn dirge for love’s opportunities lost.

2. apodictic — incontestable because demonstrable

In spite of her constant allusions to the spiritual basis of life, she seemed always to search for apodictic rules by which to live.

3. malversation — corrupt or improper conduct in office

The speaker bewailed the current political climate in his jeremiad, preaching that even blatant malversation was neither punished nor even illegal anymore.

4. tauromachia — a bullfight, bullfighting

Her taste for tauromachia showed a feral side that gave Pete pause.

5. catamite — a boy or youth in a sexual relationship with a man

Julius Caesar’s enemies often whispered that he had played the catamite on his path to political power.

6. epigraph — an inscription, on a building, statue, or the like

The epigraph at CIA headquarters — “The Truth Will Set You Free” — seems ironic unless one questions who is the subject of that sentence.

7. hypostatize — to treat as a distinct object or reality

The capitalization of all nouns in written German seems indicative of a tendency to hypostatize even the most abstract ideas.

8. maieutic — of or related to the Socratic method of education

Barzun compares the maieutic process to midwifery.

9. ambient — of the surrounding environment

It was impossible to hold an actual conversation, due to the ambient noise in the bar.

10. palliate — mitigate

The front-row seats proffered by the driver mitigated somewhat the damage done to my bike.

Sonnet


(for Anne, on the seventeenth anniversary of our first date)

This southern sun cannot eclipse the pale
And dark eternal moment under moon
When heaven’s vault baptized our dusty trail
And future wand’rings, holy and picayune.
Though breaking tides have crashed with fearsome power
Against the tender union born of love,
The lunar pull sustains each potent hour
That gravity our souls were dreaming of.
So waning fashions cannot stay the sun,
Nor waxing passions shake the timeless sphere.
In moondark rays our breathless breaths are one
As when we once orbited the silent deer.
A silent glance still strikes its resonant chime
In bodies moving still through celestial time.

Friday Vocabulary

1. sotadic — of erotic or pornographic material (after Sotades, the first known Greek erotic poet)

The Victorian Age saw an avid interest in sotadic literature, in spite of (or perhaps because of) the supposedly repressed nature of the period.

 

2. tribadism — lesbianism

The tropes of pornography have little changed since the erotic poetry of the Greeks, in which sodomy and tribadism played their eternally subversive parts.

 

3. pleonasm — redundancy

Speaking of his absolutely unique style, the artist’s agent slipped into pleonasm.

 

4. gueridon — a small stand or table

Our caesar salad was prepared tableside upon a gueridon.

 

5. anniversary — the celebration of the yearly recurrence of a past event

Perhaps I take too much umbrage at their solicitude for the relationship, but celebrating the anniversary of their first latte together seems a trifle precious.

 

6. hedonic — of pleasure

The hedonic instinct is so strong in some that it brings in its wake most unpleasurable consequences.

 

7. noxious — unhealthy

From beneath the floorboards came the most noxious odor, evidence of the buried but unforgotten past.

 

8. picayune — trivial

The wedding planner’s customers made her life difficult with their picayune objections.

 

9. ambit — area of influence

Never have my thoughts left her since once I fell within the ambit of her lovely spirit.

 

10. estrus — a female’s period of sexual receptivity

Many Dionysian aspects of sex may be seen in the fact that estrus derives from the Greek word for gadfly or madness.

Friday Vocabulary

1. bailiwick — area of expertise or skill

“I’m afraid I won’t be able to help you with your cuticular problem,” said the podiatrist. “Not my bailiwick, I’m afraid.”

 

2. cadge — to obtain through imposition upon one’s generosity or friendship

He tried to cadge another drink from his hostess in spite of his wife’s imprecations.

 

3. discalced — shoeless

In spite of his nickname, “Shoeless” Joe Jackson was not discalced when he trod the basepaths.

 

4. modest — without ostentation

She arrived at the ball wearing a modest gown.

 

5. prolicide — the murder of one’s child

Kafka asked a friend to burn his works after his death, as even his tortured ego would not allow him to commit prolicide.

 

6. tare — noxious weed (biblical)

Separating the wheat from the tares instructs us to discard the bad so that we can embrace and hold the good.

 

7. ironicon — a backwards question mark, intended as a punctuation mark to denote irony; also called a percontation point

The invention of the ironicon in the late 16th Century for ending rhetorical questions shows a great deal of doubt in the ability of authors to convey their message using words.

 

8. felicitation — congratulation

He sent his deep felicitations in a heartfelt letter to the new bride.

 

9. cavil — to quibble, to find petty objections

Do not cavil at the color of the his hair when he brings news of your lost son.

 

10. benignant — kind, particularly to inferiors

She turned her benignant gaze upon the gardener as she bade him relax and explain everything from the beginning.